at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
