Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
