Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
