the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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