i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
