maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
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