I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
