either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
The power of my boobs compel you
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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