It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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