whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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