My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
