i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Randomize