i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
