Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
