glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
