well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Found your dick twin last night
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize