And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
