just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
