Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
