its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
