Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
