Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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