Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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