good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
