We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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