i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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