I faked an abortion last night.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
