we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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