i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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