This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize