Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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