I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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