Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
we're so committed to being not committed
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize