He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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