I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize