i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
where am i from again
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
