dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
