Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Who died my cat blue again?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
