Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
