How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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