I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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