you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
