hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize