I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
