I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize