You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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