there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
