I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
