I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
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