remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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